As a bitter salve to help those of you who’ve skipped the Asparagus and are saddled with abjectly-Dickensian hangovers in the timesmudge loosely referred-to as “today”, I’d like to rub a little salt in your wounds and make it all go away.

Now the nickname could have gone one of many ways: ‘Dict, Shooter, Dragonbreath, Substance, Bender, or Sniffles.

(Cockroach has been reserved for Keith Richards for DECADES Centuries, now.)

But ultimately, it seemed prudent to just go with the obvious old stand-by.

Anyway: That’s right boys and girls. It turns out The Prince of Darkness, Ozzy Osbourne himself, is a Mutant…