Those damn old-timey people and their tree-chewing bastard folk remedies!!

-Like the nutty Euros who used to go out and suck on a White Willow for a headache; -which somebody eventually turned into those little pills we now call, “Aspirin”.

But this time, It’s Personal. Thanks to some UCLA researcher-enablers, The G**-D**N Oriental Raisin Tree is on a 1-ManTree Vendetta to put an end to my Championship Drinking Career!!…