Bonkers Face & Beauty Hacking Devices Return, Thanks To Crazy Asia! [2 Kinda NSFW]

What’s Old Is New Again!:
When we look back at the oldest editions of Popular Mechanics, Good Housekeeping, Life Magazine etc.,

The back pages are chockablock with all kinds of hilarious contraptions to reshape, maintain, & massage women’s faces and figures.

And while we make fun of them now, we’re still not past all of that yet.

-Maybe we never will be in our quest for perfection.

Well today, Crazy Japan & Crazy Asia bring you their newest face & beauty tools in the images below!

Enjoy a Future-Retro walk down a memory lane that still exists in wacky products not sold by the Vermont Country Store.

 
-All of which, would probably have electrocuted you 100 years ago…


1) Pink Vibrating Jaw-Muscle Exercise Doorknob:

Ebay-NEW OMUNI Beauty Facial Lift At Once Face Lifting Mouth Exercise Made in Japan



2) Electronic Cheek Muscle Exercise Face-Clamp:

JapanTrendShop-Maturity Haruka EX Cheek muscle slack stimulation beauty gadget



3) Electronic Neck Muscle Exerciser Thyroid Communicator [And Voice-Changer?]:

JapanTrendShop-Neck Wrinkle Iron Anti-aging, sagging beauty gadget



4) Cheekbone-Reinforcing Plastic Face-Bra:

Ebay-AntiAgeing HOUREI Lift Bra Facial Lifting Up Beauty Care Tool From Japan F/S (S)



5) Hannibal Lecter Muscle-Lifting Lower Face Mask:

Coupang-Face Mask [lifting lower face]



6) USB Heated & Ventilated Super Eye Vision Vibrating Face Plastic:

ElevenStreet-Kojima Rechargeable Eye Massager Io CME-610 Vibration Thermal



7) Airpod/Headphone-Style Deluxe Electronic Cheekbone Slimmer:

Coupang-Facial Meridian Management Vlove V1 V1



8) Miniature Facial Hair Remover Slinky:

Coupang-Facial Hair Removal Machine B-20014



9) Pink Nose Tip Refining Clamp With Silicone Bushings:

Coupang-Nose Tongs B-20045



10) Green Rock Skin Freezing Face-Zamboni For Hot-Flash Reduction:

Coupang-Ice Roller / Face Roller / Ice Pack Massager / Skin Soothing



11) Cheek & Chin Slimming Neoprene Face Slingshot:

Coupang-V-line face mask double band double-faced face line band
Amazon Sells This Too



12) Eyebrow Trimming Shears And Permanent-Surprise/Attitude Templates:

Coupang-Hudson Andy Olla Eye Makeup 4-piece set



13) BONUS! Horror-Movie Leatherface Sauna-Effect Face Mask:

JapanTrendShop-Kaomomi Mask Sauna, anti-aging skincare tool



NSFW ALERT!: Ok, Here are the two that were a little bit more risqué than the rest. Included only for the sake of humor:



14) Takiko’s Plastic Hand-Claw Breast Massager/Boob-Armpit Junction Scratcher:

Amazon-Takiko Shindo Produce Breast Gymnastics Hand Massager (Sagging bust shape reformer) from Japan



15) I Plead The Fifth:

ElevenStreet-Silicone Face Massage Face Roller Skin Care Facial Care



Photo Credits:
“Curves of Youth”, by Professor Eugene Mack
All other publicity images courtesy of vendors and original manufacturers


Links:
via: Brightside